My guest for this episode of Beyond Postpartum is the lovely Olivia Scobie, who is a mom of two, a Registered Social Worker who supports individuals and families in her private counselling practice, the founder of Postpartum Support Toronto (PPSTO), and the author of an amazing and soon-to-be released book called ‘Impossible Parenting: Creating a New Culture of Mental Health for Parents.’ And of course, so much more! I absolutely loved her book and am so incredibly honoured to share this conversation with you.
In this episode, we talk about:
- Olivia’s journey with and through postpartum depression and anxiety
- How this rough start to parenting started her off on her career and life’s work
- A bit about the history of parenting in Canada
- Being a young parent
- The disconnect between what she assumed parenting would be like and what it was
- Having a 2nd baby in a different context, and what that was like
- The importance of having primary health care providers who understand perinatal mental health
- What helped her feel better and ‘recover’ from PPD and PPA
- Her transition into her work of supporting new parents and families through her private practice and PPSTO
- The structural pressure we put on new parents to be perfect
- How we can see (and laugh at) the culture of Impossible Parenting, but still struggle with internalizing it and the cognitive dissonance that happens
- Being able to apply compassion to others but not ourselves
- The burnout that’s happening amongst parents because of the pandemic and the culture of Impossible Parenting
- The sensory overwhelm that happens when parenting young children that results in fight or flight
- Taking breaks and getting space and how important these are, and the cultural pressures not to and to be with your baby all the time
- How much easier it is to blame the individual for their struggles than it is to blame systemic issues
- What inspired her to write her book
- Her choice to use gender neutral language for the majority of her book, and also the importance of specifically discussing the feminized experience of parenting
- Attachment parenting as a philosophy
- Parenting through research when we don’t have a strong internal map
- “Shoulds” and how harmful these can be
- Focusing on personal and family values versus what we should value
- Prescriptive self-care versus care for ourselves
- Self-parenting
- Postpartum Support Toronto and what they offer
- Where to find her book