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HOME > SUPPORT SERVICES > For Supporters

For Supporters

Your support really does make a difference.

Just as it takes a village to raise a child, it takes a village to support new parents and families.

All new parents need and deserve support.

You might be noticing that a new parent in your life is struggling. Maybe it has been a few weeks or months since they welcomed a new baby into their family, and you’ve noticed that:

  • They have become irritable and lost their sense of humour.
  • They are preoccupied with many worries and is difficult to reassure.
  • You aren’t connecting with them in the same way, they are unusually distant with you and other family members or friends.
  • They have lost their self-confidence.
  • They are unwilling to leave their baby with anyone, even trusted family and friends.
  • They are overly concerned with their baby, or have very little interest in their baby.
  • They are having difficulty sleeping or relaxing, and are constantly on alert or hypervigilant.
  • They generally don’t seem like themselves – even if you can’t put a finger on it, they seem off.

“She was very tired, exhausted, and also she was short in terms of patience. She started closing herself off from the world.” ~ New dad, about when he first noticed something wasn’t right

When a new parent experiences a perinatal mood or anxiety disorder (PMAD), it is not only their partner and child/children that are affected, but their extended family and community as well. We recognize that supporting new families also means supporting those who love, care, and support them. 

Give us a call or text today: 604-255-7999 (call or text) or toll-free at 1-855-255-7999 (call only)

There are many ways to support a new parent struggling with postpartum depression and/or anxiety. You can:

  • Reassure them that they are a good parent and that things will get easier over time.
  • Encourage them to talk about their feelings with you and/or others.
  • Listen without judging or trying to fix anything.
  • Help with practical tasks around the home.
  • Encourage them to take breaks.
  • Be reliable – arrive when you say you will and give them breaks that they can count on.
  • Prepare meals and/or healthy snacks, and encourage them to eat well and drink lots of water.
  • Let them know how much you care with reassuring words, e.g., “We will get through this,” “I’m here for you,” “I love you.”
  • Remind them that difficult feelings, the situation, and their distress is temporary and that it is not their fault.
  • Point out their strengths and specific ways that you see them recovering.
  • Give positive reinforcement for their achievements, no matter how minor.
It may be hard for a new parent to admit that they are struggling. With an emphasis on the joys and bliss of early parenthood, our society doesn’t make it easy for parents who don’t live up to this myth.
New parents will often put a lot of effort into convincing the world that they are doing fine, when, in fact, they are falling apart on the inside.

Whatever the reason they are hesitant to seek support, there are still many things you can do:

  • Educate yourself on PMADs
  • Acknowledge how hard it is to be a new parent and let them know that it is common to struggle.
  • Validate their feelings, even if they don’t seem right to you
  • Point out the little things that they are doing well and minimize the impact of their “failures.”
  • Encourage them to share their feelings; make sure they don’t feel judged by you when they do.
  • Ask open-ended questions:

+ This is an overwhelming time for all new parents, how are you feeling?
+ Lots of new parents have a difficult time. Everyone needs support, I’m wondering how you’re feeling and what I can do to support you?
+ How has your experience been different from what you were expecting?
+ Are there things about being a parent that you’re finding challenging?

  • Get support for yourself – talk to a friend or family member about your experience, or give us a call.
  • Be patient and listen, and try to gently guide them to seek help and support.
 

Funding for section for supporters provided by Integrated Primary and Community Care, Vancouver Coastal Health.

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As a nonprofit and registered charity, we rely on funding from government, community grants, and private donations. Thank you for supporting us so we can continue offering support to new parents and families.